How to use the Acceptance Factor to shift conflicting subconscious beliefs

Posted by Maria on November 14, 2015 under Energy Healing, Life Coaching, Pop-Psychology, Self-Care, Spirituality, Stress Management and Relaxation, Uncategorized, Wellness | 2 Comments to Read

by Maria Koropecky, Wellness Coach

Shifting subconscious beliefs is one of the many benefits of life coaching.

A belief, as defined in the Collins English Dictionary, is “a principle, proposition, idea, etc., accepted as true.” We all have thousands of beliefs running behind the scenes through our mind and we’ve been collecting them from other people, personal experiences, and other sources, all our lives.

The belief can be anything from “I’m loveable” or “I’m not loveable” to “I don’t belong here” or “I feel safe here” to “I’m too old/too young/too this/too that to make this work,” etc., etc and these beliefs shape our experiences and perceptions and have a profound influence on the way our life plays out.

Although beliefs carry a lot of weight, they often sit outside of our conscious awareness. They’re really sneaky and slippery and we may not be able to put our finger on them so easily.

But as soon as we identify and become consciously aware of our subconscious beliefs, we can work with them and get them onboard with our new life plans because the good news is, beliefs are not carved in stone. Beliefs don’t necessarily have to be true and it’s entirely possible to challenge, change, tweak, update, clear, delete, and dissolve our beliefs, if we want to.

But what if our beliefs conflict with each other? What if we have one that’s positive and empowering and two more that are negative and defeating, all attached to and surrounding the same goal?

For example, I recently saw an interview with a woman who was at one time on the top of her game and now, twenty years later, is out of work and living in an infested trailor. She has also been diagnosed with bipolar disorder which can take a person’s mood from extreme highs (mania) to extreme lows (depression). I found it interesting that such a high achiever would end up falling so hard but it occurred to me that the extreme bipolar conditions in her mind were literally manifesting as extreme situations in her life on both ends of the spectrum, (depending on which side was running the show at the time).

I’ve been working intensely with my own beliefs lately as a means to help me be a better coach for my clients and I’ve realized that I also hold some contradictory beliefs about some things and that would explain why I’ve had mixed results and my own struggles in achieving some of my life goals so far. My conflicting and contradictory beliefs have been working against each other. As a Gemini and as someone with the Life Path #2 in Numerology, I can often see both sides of the same coin and I sometimes get confused about what to do next. Confusion does not create movement.

So I Googled “how do I get rid of contradictory subconscious beliefs” and I found this article The Saboteur Within — Why You Don’t Have What You Really Want by Dr. Robert Anthony. It made a lot of sense to me. The author said that if your subconscious mind says one thing but your conscious mind says another, they’re out of alignment which causes negativity and it’s that negative emotion that keeps people from reaching their goals. It’s the negativity that fuels the engine and negativity won’t lead to the intended destination of our imagined future.

So I got to thinking. Say I simultaneously believe that 1) I’m unloveable (negative) and 2) I’m a good catch (positive) when it comes to my dream of falling in love and getting married.

The math says: The negative belief (-) times the positive belief (+) = a negative (-) result.

If my beliefs are mostly negative, it means I’m sending mixed messages to my self and the Universe and I’m infusing all of my dreams with a negative vibe from the get-go! — No wonder I haven’t yet been able to find a date, let alone get married, even if I do think I’m a good catch!

I’ve realized, I can either uncover one belief at a time and work with it and challenge it and question it — which can work. But for me, even if I do manage to pry one belief out of the system, there are still many that go untouched and I don’t know if I can ever dismantle all of them completely.

There has to be a simpler way and the trick is to neutralize the negative charge out of the beliefs and therefore the equation/formula.

The answer is to take the negative energy out of the picture entirely!

If we eliminate the fear, shame, doubt, negativity, resistance, judgement, drama, etc., etc., from our thinking, then we can have, do, or be whatever we want!

But how do we diffuse the negativity?

When working with subconscious beliefs, we can also throw another variable into the equation and get the job done perhaps even more elagantly than one belief at a time. The answer is “Acceptance.”

Acceptance can take care of a whole cluster of beliefs all at once!

Here’s how to use the Acceptance Factor to shift conflicting subconscious beliefs:

The acceptance factor

The Acceptance Factor

Acceptance is about being OK with our reality, as it is, no matter what’s going on, right here and right now.

Also, acceptance doesn’t allow for hiding or denial because it acknowledges what is and brings things to the light of day.

Acceptance is being able to say, “It just is what it is,” “they are who they are” and “I just am who I am.”

Acceptance is also a key phrase in the Serenity Prayer.

And even if we still somehow didn’t get what we wanted once we have wholeheartedly accepted ourself, someone else, and/or the situation, acceptance makes where we are easier.

If we don’t accept what is, we suffer. If we keep on resisting, we’ll continue to create what we’re resisting over and over again in our future.

Likewise, if we can take out of the negativity and resistance and accept ourself, others, and the situation, (all of it, not just the pretty parts) all of a sudden, the negative charge gets neutralized and everything calms down and becomes lighter.

The new math equation says: [The negative belief (-) times the positive belief (+)] + Acceptance (A) = a neutral (0).

The negative charge loses it’s power and we can create from, at minimum, a place of neutral, which is way better than digging ourselves out of a hole of negativity.

Suddenly, the path will open up and we are now able to jump off a new platform!

So, how do we get to a place of acceptance? Start with being grateful and then move toward feeling safer in this world. The safer we are, the more we can accept what is.

Coaching can help, too. As a coach, I know how to structure a conversation and ask thoughtful questions and I’ll walk with you as you move toward authentic acceptance.

If you’re interested in getting help with your subconscious beliefs and reaching a place of acceptance and feeling safe, hire a coach like me. Talking with a coach will not only help you uncover hidden subconscious beliefs that may be lurking in your mind, coaching conversations will remove them from your path. On top of that, coaching will also help you reach a place of acceptance, OKness and feeling safe which will create a better future in the process.

See what acceptance opens up for you!

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  • Here’s a Calendar of Wellness & Health Awareness Days in 2016 » Homespunspa Blog said,

    [...] International Coaching Week (ICW) (International Coaching Federation) from May 16th to May 22nd — Please read my blog post, “How to use the Acceptance Factor to Shift Subconscious Beliefs.” [...]

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